What Ever You Want
by Incurable Romantic
Summary: Severus Snape is a complicated, tortured man. His motives are often impossible to understand, here is a story which attempts to explain some of those motives and it all centers around one thing- love.


What Ever You Want- a Snape fic  
By Incurable Romantic  
-It's not mine, none of it, I don't even want it, I didn't do it, you can't prove anything!-  
  
  
"Mr. Snape! Are you even listening to me?" snapped Professor Redding, the Potion's Master.  
"Yes sir," said Severus, in his usual expressionless voice that served wonderfully well for annoying teachers.  
"Well then, perhaps you could repeat, for the class, the necessary steps for today's potion."  
Severus cleared his throat and declaimed each step without a single mistake. Professor Redding growled under his breath and returned to his lecture, allowing Severus to return to his former occupation. For, he hadn't been paying attention- not that it mattered. There was no longer anything that this professor could teach him. Potions was his best subject, it was also his passion, and had been since… forever. He'd been reading potions books since he had been able to read and those were the only books he would willing pick up. For the last six years, he had simply drifted through this class, he hadn't listened to Redding, he hadn't read the assignments, and he hadn't put a single bit of effort into any assignment. He still got the best grades in the class.   
What Severus had really been doing was a whole lot more interesting than listening to ol' drier-than-sand Redding spew on. He'd been watching the prettiest girl in Hogwarts out of the corner of his eye. Not everyone would have called her the prettiest, but no one denied that those green eyes combined very nicely with her quick smile and loving nature. There wasn't a single student at Hogwarts that would have objected to Lily Evans being called a lovely girl. In Severus's eyes however, there was no one dead or alive who could match her, there was only one thing that marred her perfection- her boyfriend.  
That prick Potter had had his eye on Lily since he'd first begun to notice girls in second year. It was one thing in the guy's favor, though Severus hated to allow him even that one thing, he did have great taste in women. There was nothing redeeming about Potter, if one ignored his good looks, high intelligence, quick humor, excellent manners, and incredible athletic ability. Severus hated him for his perfection, but the thing that bugged him the most was that, if Potter hadn't been in love with Severus's dream-girl, the two boys might have even been friends. Maybe.  
Severus was hardly an over-achiever. Other than Potions, there wasn't a class that he excelled in. He wasn't poor in any of them either. He was one of the class "if only he'd apply himself more…" students, many of his teachers despaired of getting him to reach the potential they could feel in him, and as he grew older a number of the staff actually grew frightened of him. The one thing he did work at was Quidditch. Sadly, he never got very good at the game, despite all his practice. His bitterness at Potter grew each time he'd be shown up on the field.  
Severus growled under his breath and turned his thoughts away from Potter. After all, it wasn't Potter he was watching, it was Lily. The Lily who he'd been in love with since she'd plopped down beside him on his very first train ride to Hogwarts.  
  
"Excuse me, is this seat saved?" asked a very small red-headed girl.  
"What?" replied the even smaller black haired boy, who was sitting with an open book on his lap.  
"I'll take that as a no," she said and proceeded to clamber right up next to the boy. Then she stuck out her hand while introducing herself in a rush. "Lily Evans, first year. I have no idea what's going on right now, because I guess I'm a… what-do-you-call-em? Muggle-born. I got my letter a few months ago and was just knocked over. Had no idea there was really such a thing as magic. Although I'm glad there is. But I must say, the special train station thing is brilliant. Nine and three-quarters, hilarious. My parents were nervous about sending me off, but I suppose most would be. Were yours?"   
Somewhere during that deluge, which didn't seem to include a breath, Severus had shaken the outstretched hand and then he had just listened in amazement to this bright, bubbly girl as she grasped his hand. There had been several seconds of silence before Severus realized what she had asked.  
"Uh… they were a little, I guess. But they were also proud that I got in," he said a little hesitantly. Lily laughed and Severus was totally lost, his heart forever gone to this girl who'd managed to chase away in ten seconds his worst fear- that no one at Hogwarts would want to talk to him.  
"Well, of course. So were mine, you know, but my sister was a whole different matter. She didn't approve at all. Petunia is… rather stuffy about things. She thinks she's so grown-up and that magic and mystery and fantasy, and probably love too is silly kid things. But I don't agree with that. I think that magic and love are the most precious things anyone can have. That and imagination. I would hate to not have an imagination; life would be so boring wouldn't it? Then again… love is definitely more important than magic, because people can be awful and still have magic, just look at all the evil wizards there've been, but love… is everything. I don't what I'd do without the love of my parents and my friends of course. And I'm not quite old enough for the… the other sort of love, but one day I will be. Say… I still don't know your name." Lily stopped and then laughed again. "I'm sorry, I talk too much, everyone says so, but I can't help myself. There are so many fascinating things to say don't you think?"   
"Uh… I don't mind," said Severus.  
"You are so nice. I've decided. You are going to be my first friend at Hogwarts. You can't get out of it now. I said so. I want to have lots and lots of friends. But you'll be special, because you'll be my first one. And that's a very special position, you know? But, you can't be my official first friend until I know your name."  
"Severus Snape," he said, Lily squealed.  
"What a great name! I love names, at least the interesting ones. I'm so jealous of you now. My name is so boring and old fashioned. I can't stand common, ordinary names. Like mine. Really, what kind of parent names their child after a flower?! When I have a kid, I won't name it something boring. I'll give my child a wonderful name, one with a story behind it. I think your name is so great."   
She paused for a second and looked at him critically. Severus hoped that he passed her test, having no idea what the test was. He didn't want this adorable girl to be disappointed in him, because it was really pleasant to sit there with her hand in his, listening to her chat away.  
"I like your eyes too," she said at last. "They're beautiful. Everyone says I have interesting eyes. They never call them beautiful though, because green is too strange to be beautiful, but yours are definitely beautiful. They aren't exactly brown- they have a bit of hazel in them. You're hair is nice too, though you should grow it longer. I think guys with long hair are cool." Severus took advantage of the momentary silence and screwed up his courage.  
"I think your eyes are beautiful. They are… not like anything I've ever seen before. Um… your name is really pretty too."   
Lily smiled at Severus, a different smile than she'd used before. She seemed just the slightest bit embarrassed. At this point the train started moving and jolt sent Severus's long-abandoned reading to the floor with a bang.  
"Hey, the train started. Is that your book?" Severus nodded. "May I?" Severus nodded again and Lily reached to pick up the book, which meant she finally let go of Severus's hand. He was perturbed to find that the loss disappointed him, but he tried to look nonchalant about it, seeing as how there were four other boys sitting on the other side of the compartment.  
Lily sat up with the book. She turned it over to see the cover.  
"It's a potion's book," said Severus, feeling the sudden desperation to impress her as much as she'd impressed him, "I read a lot of them. I'm very interested in Potions." Lily beamed at him. It could hardly be called a simple smile, it was far too radiant and total to be anything less than a beam.  
"I read a bit about Potions in my new school books. Maybe you could tell me more about it, since you know so much."  
Severus was happy to oblige and the two of them spent the rest of the train ride talking about all the tings they were going to learn this year. Lily had endless store of questions about wizarding things and she was happy to fill Severus in about Muggle things. They were only interrupted twice. First by the snack cart, when Severus shyly offered to buy Lily some chocolate frogs, he was rewarded by her unrestrained excitement and gratitude.  
The second time, the interruption came from the four students across from them, who introduced themselves as James Potter, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew. Severus was slightly miffed at the attention Lily gave to them, but was mollified a little when she excused herself saying,  
"Forgive me, but I was telling my friend Severus about the postal service." The Black boy made a remark about "Muggle stuff" and the boys went back to crude jokes and tall tales of escapades, which Severus highly doubted they'd ever been a part of.  
  
Severus sighed. It really was too bad that they had ended up in different houses, not to add the whole rival factor. They had remained friends, but they grew further and further apart. They really had little to base a relationship on other than a shared train ride. Severus however, continued to love her, near or far.   
Lily had flourished. She was still friendly and loving, but she controlled her run-away tongue a bit better. She was one the top students, almost as good as Severus in Potions even. She had several close friends, as well many good friends. Then there was her boyfriend.  
By contrast, Severus had not fared so well. He was a loner, with a reputation for being unpleasant. The younger students feared him and the older ones disliked him, as he was too ambitious to be ignored completely, but not powerful enough to be any use. But he hardly cared. He knew that one day all that would change, because one day Lily would look at him with those beautiful green eyes of hers, she'd open her lips, the ones that Severus longed to kiss, and she'd say,  
"Severus, are you using those Mandrake roots?"  
"What?" Severus blinked himself out of his daydream. Lily beamed.  
"I'll take that as a no," she said. He handed her the item she's requested and watched as she walked way, walked back to Potter.  
His mind turned, as it had been doing so often of late, to the conversation he'd had on the last day of school the previous year with Lucius Malfoy, who had just graduated.  
  
"He's going to be more powerful than Grindlewald soon and I'm going to be there from the start. You should join him Severus; you have a talent for Potions. And with the power he's offering- you could have what ever you want."  
  
Severus shook his head, as he always did, and began his potion. He wasn't ready for a dark master, but every time he shook his head, he shook it a little less firmly. :::what ever you want::: 


End file.
